What I want to do today and what I should do today are two distinctly different things. Seeing as it’s approaching mid-to-late afternoon and I’m still in my bathrobe, it’s time to hash this out and convince myself to be virtuous.

First, here is what I should do today, and the results of those actions if I actually do them:
Should #1: Clean up the apartment.
Result: I will be able to find things again. And it will look nice, and I will get some satisfaction out of looking around and seeing everything all neat and tidy.

Should #2: Work out.
Result: I’ll feel all strong and pleased with myself, and like I did something good for my body.

Should #3: Finish my Christmas shopping.
Result: I’ll be more relaxed and happy leading into the holidays, instead of all frayed and disorganized.

Should #4: Um ... actually shower and get dressed.
Result: I won’t feel like such a disgusting shlub. I might even feel pretty and like I have my act together.

And now, here is what I would prefer to do today instead of the above list of Shoulds:
Want #1: Lie on the couch and watch TV.
Result: It would certainly be fun while it lasted, but it would be a big bummer when TV time was over and I looked around the apartment and wondered when the tornado hit.

Want #2: I want to eat all kinds of things. Not even necessarily bad things, just things, and preferably in high volume.
Result: I would look down at my chub and ask what the hell I was thinking when I did that to myself.

Want #3: Bonus Combo! Lie on the couch while I watch TV and eat things simultaneously.
Result: I would feel frustrated that there’s a bunch of garbage on TV anyway, and that I would have to keep getting up to go back to the kitchen to get more food to stuff myself with, and then see the Result of Want #2.

Want #4: I want to stay in my bathrobe all day until it’s time for bed tonight and then I won’t have worn any clothes that would need to be put away.
Result: I would wonder where the hell my day went, and why I wasted it lying around in my bathrobe.

This little drill definitely just convinced me to get off my tushie and Do Stuff, because if I spend today eating and watching TV in my bathrobe, then tomorrow will officially Suck Ass™ because I would be faced with the same load of chores and even more dread because of the pressure and the Still Not Wanting To. If I actually do everything I’m supposed to this afternoon, then tomorrow I will wake up feeling all accomplished and happy and relaxed in my nice clean apartment, and my body will feel like a temple.*

*Except for my ever-so-slightly-polluting Diet Coke with Splenda consumption.